CONFESSIONS OF A BYGONE FREEMASON

A fortnight ago I  published the letter of a Spanish Freemason who criticized  the current state of the Grand Lodge of his Country and castigated the actions of its leader.  This time  I am  submitting  for  your reading  an article by  an anonymous English former Brother,  that The Square magazine published in its issue of September 2016.

The author of it does quite a good  self analysis of the reasons  he resigned from the Craft. He has also listed the justifications  – and there are many ! – that other brothers told him they had  for quitting Freemasonry and never return to it.

It makes an interesting reading .

Aldo Reno

Why I left Freemasonry

I met the editor of the  magazine The Square  at a formal dinner, where he learned that I had been a Freemason but had severed all ties with it and he persuaded me to write down the real reasons for leaving the Craft.

Here is my story.

l joined Freemasonry after meeting the owner of a shop in my town. We got on well together and  I bought various  books from him.  From time to time we would also talk about Freemasonry ,  provided that no one else was on the premises. He was quite a keen Brother and he wondered if I might be interested.  I had no connection at all to Freemasonry and no one in my family had ever been  a member of the Order,  but after reading about it (the good and the bad) I  decided to join and  find out for myself.

 My problems started very quickly.

At my Initiation,I could hardly stop myself from laughing aloud when the penalties were presented. What nonsense! However, after my second degree I became very involved and went into offices and visited quite a lot.  I also attended a research lodge, which was usually quite boring, and I even went to a Masonic conference.  I met some members who I got on with and whose company l enjoyed, but unfortunately none of them were in the lodge I belonged to.

I started to become bored and disenchanted with what I was experiencing and with the people I was in the lodge with. When I quietly talked with others from different lodges about it , I found that quite a few of them felt the same way.

In time I  joined another lodge and a Chapter.

The second lodge was a little better than my first  but I found  the  ritual of the Royal Arch Chapter  virtually incomprehensible. No one could explain what any of it meant.

l began to miss meetings and eventually I just resigned from all my lodges. I don’t think I was missed at all. When I left I was asked to give my reasons and  I gave a politically correct answer on the line that l did not have the time to participate properly  because my work commitments had to take priority. They accepted my excuse  because I think they were not really that bothered whether I stayed or I left.

Over the next few years, I met many men who had also left Freemasonry. Some of them had not even been asked why they were leaving,  or the question was put  to them  in a way that showed that the questioner was only going through the motions of asking.

I  enquiried  those former brothers  for  the real reason(s)  they had  left the Craft and I have reported them at the end of this article. Most of what I have listed , however, is drawn from the  memory I have retained  of the conversations held because I obviously did not keep notes or write down what the brothers were saying.

My recollections are that there were those who had enjoyed Freemasonry but whose  circumstance had caused them to fall away. For example, they  had moved to another locality where it was more difficult to get to a lodge; they had become  ill and thus did  not attend  for quite a while and just got  out of the habit;  they had  a wife to care for; had changed their job or the membership of their lodge had changed and their mates were no longer attending.  I could not talk with the dead but some commented that with the death of some of  their brother(s)  their interest had declined. Many had reached a point where they were paying subscriptions and never attending and since in many cases the subscriptions included the cost of  a meal – their financial loss was high. There were some younger men who really did have to put work before Freemasonry because the lodge meeting times and places were such that they could not get there.  For someone who worked 9-5 in an office, it would be very difficult to get leave earlier.

But I also heard of many other reasons and some of them  were similar to my own thoughts. Perhaps it is  best if I just list them , but please bear in mind that these  are not exact quotes.

• The membership is too old and stuck in its ways. I don’t want to spend my evenings with pedantic old men.
• The whole thing is too pompous – all that bowing and scraping to people who are nobody.
• It is too hierarchic. Decisions are just made and imposed – yet I pay to belong to this.
• There are too many pontificating hypocrites. Senior people are shown to be very questionable – but they really do not like to be questioned.
• There is so much politicking and back-biting going on.
• The ritual is too old fashioned and frankly often stupid. Many say it but do not believe it. I know plenty that do not believe in God, for example.
• It is far too religious – if I want the Bible and prayers, I can go to church.
• We do the same thing over and over again (usually badly). Does anybody ever talk about it?
• The whole thing is far too time-consuming. It can take over your life.
• The meals are poor, the speeches are worse and we have to do the same thing over again every time.
• The members are not important in the community. Most are really nobody. Some are worse – we had two alcoholics in my lodge and one member committed suicide. So much for love and support!
• I can use my time in other ways and  much better. They got really upset when I did not want to spend months learning ritual – yet we never had a candidate.  What is the point?
• I am tired of always being asked for more charity – where does it really go ?
• All those ranks and titles for people who have never done anything.
• Some can’t even open and close a lodge. The intellectual level is very poor.
• The same people seem to have been running it for years – are they ever asked to take responsibility for problems?
• The sucking up to get higher rank is very sad and shameful.
  
• What is the point of Freemasonry? What is it really trying to provide? It seems to be wanting to be all things to all people and it finishes up doing much of it badly.
• It had no relevance in my life especially as it largely does not involve my wife or family. It brings no benefits.
• It seems to be living  in the past. They are always talking about the great Masons who lived centuries ago.
• Our Hall is of poor quality. I am not happy taking my wife and friends there.
• My friends just laughed when they knew I was a Freemason; it is seen as ridiculous by quite a few and others have such wild ideas about it. I tried to tell them we were not Satanists or esoteric nutters but then you read books written by Freemasons themselves which are ludicrous.

 (…)This is the reality of what ex-Freemasons confided  to me. I realise that some may have had isolated experiences and their dissatisfaction was not  ‘all or nothing”.  However, these are the issues that were raised and the end result had been in all cases that those Freemasons had eventually left. Not one of them ever said to me that they missed it and wished they had stayed.   I did learn very quickly that large numbers do leave and that there is a steady decline every year.

I was also asked by the magazine’s editor what would have kept me in Freemasonry, as he, like many others, seems to be happy and very involved in it. The answer to that is that I am not sure. l think that at the core, my membership was not leading to anything that had any value or meaning for me. It did not help me spiritually. Socially I did meet some new people but I only ever invited one to my home and this is the only person I have kept as a friend. The lodge rhetoric did not seem to be translated into real action. When I left, there were members of the lodge I had never met.  I suppose I expected Freemasonry to benefit me in some way and as it never did , I became frustrated.

I think that change, if it ever happens, will have to come at the lodge level with every member committed to being part of a supportive brotherhood, which must continue outside  the lodge. This is not easy when you do not choose the members of the lodge you join. There are enough problems in families to show how similar problems can arise.  Maybe I joined the wrong lodge – but there were plenty of other brothers who seemed to have joined the wrong lodges too.

I think I expected that Freemasonry  wanted much more of me and  that it  would have  provided  the proper support. What ,instead , I found was that I was on my own !  and so I met with strangers every so often and met them again some time later to go through the same routines.

I just got bored with it all.

How can the lodge and the officers live  with this?  Perhaps one starts  by admitting the problems and then admitting that most are caused by the members and the rulers themselves. I suspect that some simple things could be done immediately like, for example,  let  everybody wear a simple white apron – no decorations.  It would be a lot cheaper for many but I think it would also send out a clear message that we are all equal brothers.

I also would remove all the religious trappings and present  Freemasonry  simply as a moral organisation.

I think lodges need to carry out  projects in the community ; doing  good would unite its members.  I would also involve wives and families far more than they are now.  But most of all you need to have the courage to jump on any member who is strayìng from the Masonic principles – for example  anyone who is backstabbing, is being derogatory, is  finding faults in everything and every brother. Freemasons, therefore, need to be very careful in who becomes a member.  Frankly, for me  I think it is too late and I am sorry to say that, whatever the Freemasons  do, it will never include me again.